Thank you for all of your concerns regarding my family. But my family is not doing well. 8000+ of my family members are dead by now and don't know how many are dying. The rest are homeless and are out side suffering. How am I supposed to sleep when my family is outside in the dark, in cold while it's raining. How am I supposed to eat when my families have nothing to eat. My home is devastated, my families struggling for survival. I need your prayers, I'm restless and helpless. I want to go home and help, but I read these posts that suggests it would be stupidity to go right now if I'm not a well trained medical personnel or trained with disaster relief measures. BUT my heart is restless and I'm not being able to do anything here. I want to be there and help. Please remember in prayers!!!!
The above paragraph is what i wrote a week ago. And nevertheless my heart still aches. It breaks my heart to hear about how people in mt country are in problem. Estimated 10000 more people are dead. I want to be there and help. But i have responsibilities here in Indonesia which i have to finish. Last week on the 25th of April I was in my room in Ngeling talking to my friend Mallery, i suddenly checked my phone and checked my facebook and i saw lots of status that said there was an earthquake, a lot of them. I didnt panic because even i have experienced quakes while i was in Nepal. That is what i thought for some time. After some minutes there was showers of status. One of my friend he all of a sudden messaged me, He told me that Nepal is devastated and there was a big earth quake which is not stopping, He told me this could be his last time messaging me. After that i got little worried. i checked internet and found that there was a very big earthquake in Nepal. And thousands of life was estimated to be dead. I was worried and shattered. I tried calling my family i couldn't. I was worrying and praying. I tried calling my family the whole day i couldn't. I was shattered, i was scared to never be able to see them again. I was crying and praying like a mad person. Around 9pm i tried calling my mom again and finally after hours of suffering I heard her voice. I cannot explain how i felt at that moment. She told me she and my brother are doing fine but my church and my house was badly affected. She told me the quake has not stopped yet. My dad at that time was in the east Nepal, So that made me even more worried. But my mom told me she was happy that I was safe in Indonesia. This statement of hers broke me heart, it shattered my heart. All the Nepalese were out of their houses and slept outside for a week by then and there are still lots who are still outside because they have no houses left. I couldn't eat and sleep for a week. All the devastating pictures are still in my mind. I hate the fact that i am not there, I am unable to help them and offer them my helping hands, but I am aware of my responsibilities here. I have to finish the task I have started. And maybe this devastation has another chapter for my country and country people.
Please remember my Country in your prayers. As I'm writing this my heart aches and tears start dropping.
Everyday I wake up and the only thing that comes in my mind is my people there in Nepal. My family is doing fine but i don't know about my other families and many of my friends. Last week I got news one of my friend had died in the disaster. This is the hardest and most restless time of my life.